Let's talk about purple crocodiles

The equivalent of red tape

Besides the fact that it would be kind of fun if purple crocodiles actually existed, it is, as you probably guessed, an interesting analogy. In this case, of Dutch origin, but don’t worry, it has an English sibling. The term “Purple Crocodile” originates from a 2004 advertisement for an insurance company, in which a little girl and her mother arrive at a reception desk to retrieve her inflatable purple crocodile from the lost and found.

In short; The girl sees her beloved crocodile at the reception and expects to receive it back. Sadly, it turns out not to be that simple when the disinterested employee pulls out a form, instead of the inflatable crocodile. The form must first be completed and returned to the Recreation Department the next day. The mother indicates that the animal is behind the man, which he acknowledges, but takes no further action to help them.

The crocodile in the room explained

Yes, very perceptive of you, dear reader; A purple crocodile represents bureaucracy and exaggerated rules. It has become a typical Dutch expression and is being used in The Netherlands until this day, to point out the country’s many complicated traits and customs, often experienced as annoying, to as well the local population, as travelers or immigrants. The purple crocodile was so popular, that it became a viral hit and synonymous with bureaucracy and illogical rules in general.

You are often obligated to request a permit for everything you can think of, even on your own property. Sometimes, you have to pay double taxes on something you buy and sell, and there’s a certain likelihood you will get audited in your first year as a new starting independent, with barely any income, to check if you're not evading taxes. On the other hand, there are of course much fewer restrictions for a government or local authority regarding bureaucracy, when it is convenient for them. Especially tax and permit authorities. No matter how incorrect they may be and how much it disadvantages the citizen, resistance is futile. In addition, it often turns out that certain rules apply to you, but not to the more influential or richer people. After all, “rules for thee but not for me” is a global concept.

The history of its equivalent

Now let’s talk about the purple crocodile’s equivalent; Red tape. It mostly has the same definition, except for the part about “bureaucracy claiming to hinder or prevent action or decision-making.” That one has a more political ring to it and is usually applied by governments, corporations, and other large organizations. Maybe it’s because the term; “Red tape” is much older and is thought to be a reference to the Spanish reign of Charles V, King of Spain in the sixteenth century. In those days, important administrative documents were bundled with a red cord to distinguish them from documents that had standard priority. This method was later adopted by other European heads of state where the oldest known documents archived like this date from 1914.

Nevertheless, putting red tape on something, reads more like deliberately setting up a barrier to make one's own goals more achievable in hopes that the opponent will give up. Almost the same as a purple crocodile, but slightly different. Don’t get me wrong, rules and regulations are important to prevent chaos. They most definitely have value. And even though seemingly unnecessary rules can create unnecessary chaos, that can be annoying and unproductive, that’s it. Red tape has more permanent damage and can diminish chances, hopes, and dreams.

Stakeholder Red Tape

The more sophisticated definition would be; “Rules, regulations, and procedures that remain in effect and impose a compliance burden, but do not further the legitimate purposes for which the rules were intended.” It has a ring to it that’s a synonym for purposely dysfunctional. Both for the organization and for the intended purpose, commonly known as; “stakeholder red tape.”

While a term like “purple crocodile” seems amusing, funny even, I suspect it is often used to whitewash bureaucracy. If the customer or injured party ultimately persists in their actions, everything may turn out fine in the end, but only depending on the person's own persistence. The imposed complicated system will certainly not work for you on its own.

On a higher level though, or should I say; “Red tape level,’ the principles of transparency, accountability, and justice, are often neglected when it comes to equal results for society, leading to unfair consequences for many. On that level, our voices should be heard as well, but that doesn’t mean we should stop shouting.

Whenever in the Netherlands…,

I wholeheartedly advise you to use and learn the words “purple crocodile” (In Dutch: “Paarse krokodil,”) by heart, and use them whenever you feel disadvantaged by our sometimes overactive bureaucracy. It might work to break through the barrier. Good luck and let me know if it worked!

Thank you for reading,

Mo.

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